Have you ever been around somebody who just instantly sucks the life out of you…and sucks the life out of any bloody situation?
You’ll know this type of person because as soon as they walk into the room, you feel like every last drop of enthusiasm you had for life has just drained out of your every pore?
Unfortunately I’ve had this unpleasant experience lately. It’s one of those unexplainable gut feelings, because even talking to these types of people leaves you feeling like you could sleep for a week… exhausting!
It reminded me of a nice little example an old friend gave me YEARS ago…
There are two types of people in the world:
Now, I’m not talking about plumbing here, that’s not my speciality (or anywhere near it! Hah!)
However, I am talking about how everybody in the world fits into one of these categories,
and it’s blatantly obvious when you come across a ‘drain’.
If possible, I would advise you to avoid them at ALL costs.
Even if they’re family… (easier said than done – but doable!)
Firstly, let’s look at how you would identify a ‘drain’…
Well, they tend to be emotionally destructive beings,
pessimistic and unable to see the solution to their problems (even if it’s put right under their nose- they’d rather wallow in their own pity than fix their problems.
They’re also what I would class as ‘attention seekers’. They’ll lead a full conversation only by talking about themselves, their problems and how bad they feel.
They’ll list all of their problems, without coming up for air,
bitch about people,
delve into other people’s business and always seem to be negative,
Feeling like s*it yet? Have you identified any drains in your life yet? It even makes me feel sad just thinking about these people.
RADIATORS, on the other hand
bleed WARMTH, kindness, love,
honesty, positivity, energy and enthusiasm
without effort << important
Radiators are interested in finding out about you,
not vomiting all of their problems onto you. They’re curious people, genuinely interested in you and finding out what they can do to help you. They will offer their help without asking for anything in return.
They will hug you and keep you warm.
They’re fun to be around,
you’ll feel safe with them – your secrets will be safe with them.
They’re trustworthy and glowing.
They will never share your secrets or innermost thoughts. You can trust them. And they will never reveal other people’s secrets and innermost thoughts to you either, without their permission.
So here’s my advice…
Step over the drains
and hug the radiators.
Place an invisible forcefield around you
if you can’t get away from the drains (maybe you work with them).
Spend more time trying to radiate a bit more
yourself so that you will naturally attract more radiators into your life.
Spend less time with people who
bitch and moan.
Spend time with people who have
personality traits that you would like to have.
Spend less time with the energy vampires.
Surround yourself with people who are on the
same mission as you, and who will support you
without force or falseness.
you need to be prepared to lose some people from your life – these could be friends, family or even workmates. If it’s meant to be, it will never be forced, but will be a natural and gradual life progression – in a way that you may not even notice it happening.
If you find that you have more drains in your life right now than radiators,
it may be that you need to take a step back and look at yourself first. Are you a drain? Do you need to start radiating warmth first before you can attract radiators into your life?
Do you bitch and moan more often than you release positivity? It can be a hard pill to swallow, admitting this. But it’s life changing.
Take a look at yourself from the outside in,
how do you appear to others? Is it time for change?